Ferver

i went out last night. went to a friends cabin. it was about a forty five minute drive north. I suppose it was a good time. I think you decide when you are having a good time. They don’t happen, and they’re not given situations. I am unsatisfied with where I’m at at this school. No offense to anyone but this is not what I want. Im not sure anyone does here tho. I want more. and im looking forward to getting more. i need some emotional stimulation. nothing shallow. I want people to peak my interest. does that happen anymore? do people ever surprise me anymore? am i chasing something too good to be true? how deep am i looking? i hate the smell of rotten beer and cigarette. i want fresh. like fresh white sheets. in a room with the windows open and white draperies flowing in the wind. my eyes are heavy. my breathing is shallow

if you are stupid, can you recognize intelligence? do stupid people recognize intelligence when they here it? or are they so ignorant that it hurts to listen?

ive been sitting in my room all day. im gonna go for a walk. its getting cold. ripping tearing slicing gnawing.