I’m tired. My eyelids are heavy.
I’ve been pondering life. Feelings. Where I’m at. It feels good.
Wherever you want to be, in order to get there, it requires utter devotion and sacrifice. It required submitting emotionally. It requires spending all the conceivable time and energy to make it your life.
If your visions are not your life, they will never become reality.
If you don’t like the way something is, change it. Put yourself out there and risk everything. Risk it. Risk it all. Risk failure. Risk humiliation. Expose your vulnerabilities, expose your weaknesses. Put your balls on the table and see what you’re made of.
What are you made of? What the fuck are you made of? How far are you willing to go? Are you willing to die? If you aren’t willing to die for your life, then you aren’t willing to truly live.
How do you expect to feel alive if you feel safe?
Safety doesn’t challenge us. Comfort does’t force us to grow.
PAIN forces us into growth. It is the necessary prerequisite to growth. Get uncomfortable. Go there, head first. If you are not of the attitude to endure and embrace pain for pains sake, then you are not capable of earning anything.
Character is what you earn in proportion to the pain your endure, and overcome. Learn to define the pain, instead of letting it define you. This yields character.
Pain is dissonance. It is taking a risk. It is being uncertain. It is doubt. It is insecurity.
Fuck pain and your fear of it.
Bring it the fuck on. If it kills me, so fucking what. I hope it does. I hope it fucking kills me. If it doesn’t, it will make me that much stronger. I will learn to adapt.
So bring it the fuck on. I eat pain. Let it fucking wake me from sleep. Pour the pain on thick. Be willing to lose it all. Over and over and over. Because IT is nothing. Gains are symptoms of character in practice. Pride is illusion. Identity is shifting ego bullshit. Be bigger than the narrow self. Be anything. Be everything. Be nothing. Bring it the fuck on. Let me consume it. Let the pain lick me all over. Let the pain sear me like hot coals poured over my insides. Let it torture me until I transcend my self pity.
I will overcome it. I refuse to let pain, worry, doubt, pity, bullshit drama define me and my life.
I am the overlord of my life, my thoughts, my circumstance. I am the master of my destiny, the captain of my fate. I cannot control anything but my thoughts, and my attitude, and I will always be the architect to my present and future life moments.
Every moment is determined by a prevailing attitude.
Life is hard. Get the fuck over it. It’s hard for everyone. It doesn’t get easier. You get stronger. Man the fuck up. Stop crying. Own it. Take ownership and responsibility. No one owes you shit. You find a way to get what you want. You don’t depend on anyone. You figure it the fuck out. You find a make or you make a way. Always remember: where there is a will, there is a way. Get some grit and grind, conjure will power and focus your mind on the object of your desire.
Do NOT distract yourself from the pain.
Don’t you fucking dare. You fucking look that pain in the god damn eye, and you confront it. Ask yourself, what is it causing the pain? You fucking look it in the eye, and you do something about it. You find out what the fuck it is. You don’t mask it. You don’t deaden it. You don’t drug it. You don’t deny it. You don’t suppress it. You don’t wish it wasn’t there.
You grab it by the fucking throat, and you look it in the eyes, and you ask it: What the fuck do you want from me? And you don’t fucking go anywhere until that pain gives you an answer.
When it does, take fucking charge and change it. Your life is at stake.
Make a plan, decide what actions get you there, and act immediately. Focus the mind. Do not delay.
Decide to change the pain, because the pain alone will not change you.
Allow the pain of not changing to be greater than the pain of changing. Until that happens, you won’t change.
So sober the fuck up.
Stop the fucking distractions.
Grab pain by the throat and look it deep in the eyes and ask it what it wants from you. When you get an answer, give it exactly what the fuck it wants. Give it everything. Do not hold back. Do everything in your power to change the pain.
The ONLY solace of pain you possess is that these decisions will potentially alleviate pain.
If there is any ever solace other than that, you will again find yourself miserable.