I just got off the phone with the girl. Shes a trip. Asks too many questions. I don’t really see eye to eye with her on every issue. Normally that’d be enough to stop talking to her right there, but for some reason I continue to. Many I’m pathetic. Maybe I’m maturing and I realize you won’t ever find a ‘perfect 10’ and that settling on a 9 isn’t settling…ha.
She asked some pretty personal stuff about past relationships and what not and typically I’d respond back with no hesitation, cause I just don’t care, but I stopped myself and decided there are some things I didn’t want to just air out too soon… and she began playing this stupid game like.. I won’t talk to you until you tell me sorta deal. Even though she did, she was just being difficult and short and everything. That stuff gets under my skin.. usually to the point where I’m like.. peace. Because it was something that wasn’t that big of deal in my mind, I ended up telling her anyway. But I got a good idea of how she handles crap like that, and I don’t like it too much.
Anyway. She’s neat. Some incongruities in our world view and values. Shes HUGE on God. I was ‘raised’ Christian. But you know… I began reading… and that was the end of me. Perspective ruined me. Camus, Sartre, Nietzsche, Kafka, Dostoevsky, etc.,… all of them. So now I’m just confused. I still believe in God. I have a little broader definition of him, although not washed out. Just not typical. Aka… I’m confused… and all that really exists are atoms and space… and everything else is opinion.
So we talked for a little over an hour. She asked me to tell her a story.. ha. I never did that before… So.. I began. In short, it was about a lil girl who was raised by parents who were in the circus. This little girl had a big heart for people and would collect all the pennies and nickels in the gutter and ground and give them to people in need and church every week. it was about her growin up and all the people she met and their adventures. She was slipping off to sleep so I told her I’d resume some other time and let her sleep.
And I need to sleep. 8:30 class. Need to wake up and finish editing an essay before class.
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William Dare 