My life is boring. I expect it to be that way so I can’t say I’m surprised. I’ve got myself programmed to believe I’m working toward some fulfilling goal. That this dreary boredom is somehow a payment for treasures ahead. I wonder how much I lie to myself.
One side of me is restrained, reserved, conservative, deliberate, cautious, wise, calculated, thoughtful, charming and principled. That is the man in me. The other side of me is wild, spontaneous, playful, risky, joyous, dreamy, unguided, loving, surprised, and filled with a never ending awe. This is the boy in me.
The boy in me wants to travel, see far off distant lands, meet sweet girls, play in the grass, feel, touch, love, kiss, and just delve into adventure after adventure.
The man in me wants to offer security, stability, support, and reliability.
I’m torn with these very opposite impulses. While one is reflective and overall wiser from his experience, the other is thirsting for life and newness. It wants spice! It wants girls! It wants to play! It doesn’t want schedules or responsibility! It wants to play music, and sing, and draw, and paint, and run, and jump, and scream, and laugh, and smile, and soak up feeling life all around.
William Dare 