Expunging thoughts

I studied philosophy of language all day.  Prior to today I had only a vague understanding of the material. It seemed too abstract and intuitive to take seriously. I’m looking forward to learning about the significant consequences that the philosophy of language has on the subjects of metaphysics, hermeneutics, phenomenology, and logic made by the contributions of these philosophers.

I’m pretty fried at the moment. While I went out briefly last night, I didn’t drink. I also stayed in all day today and missed out on tailgating and partying with all the families that came to visit for parents weekend.

My mind is hypersensitive. Whatever stimulation I throw at it inevitably consumes me; I get lost in preoccupation and lose sight of anything that isn’t immediate. Juggling too many tasks and responsibilities causes me to lose focus of the significance of each priority.  I have a problem saying no to commitments, be it people or other perceived or real responsibilities. As a result, I have to limit my exposure to  multifarious demands. That typically means locking myself away for awhile to attend to only the most pressing obligations so the demands and stimulation are concentrated and consistent.

If I stimulate myself with enough specific information, I become consumed in its depth. I hyperfocus. Pulling me out of that state is almost impossible. It becomes my all engrossing world. It could be lifting, or a specific discipline or even a person. I spend my attention and energy exploring the limits of the object or subject until it is exhausted, or I am exhausted. I have to remind myself that college was a choice to focus my attention on cultivating my knowledge and skills in specific areas that would leave me more valuable than before. If I fail to give it my all I would be no better than when I started.